Locusmortis’ PREVIEWS Hits and Misses™

LM PREVIEWS COLUMN BANNER

Every month I pre-order comics, trades and other related items from Previews magazine. Even though there is information online for just about everything, I still find the Previews catalog to be the simplest way to scan through the different items and to get some inspiration on what I want to buy.

There’s lots of stuff being offered by Diamond this month: Plenty of great stuff and plenty of crap too… So I will try to sort the wheat from the chaff and hopefully point out some good items that you might order or buy from your LCS or Online Retailer. Our taste may differ– so if you buy something and I hate it… Don’t blame me. I did my best to warn you!

Most of the following products will see release in June/July 2014!

The STATUS in the description of each product indicates the likelihood of whether I’m going to order it ranging from Firm Order as the most likely to a POS (Piece of Shit)– with everything else being somewhere in between. I’m sure you can figure it out!
LM PREVIEWS COMICS BANNER FINAL

LM PREVIEWS BALLOON DARK HORSE

Emily and the Strangers Breaking the Record #1
32 Pages
$3.99

Status: Trade-waiting

Additional Notes: The first Emily and the Strangers series was one of my favourite books of 2013. I just recently got a very nice hardcover collection of it and I can’t recommend this series highly enough.


Eye of Newt #1
32 Pages
$3.99

Status: Tempted

Additional Notes: This looks like the kind of book that Vertigo would have produced in its heyday. One to be watched, I believe.


Ring of the Nibelung HC
488 Pages
$29.95

Status: Tempted

Additional Notes: Simply put, P. Craig Russell is one of America’s greatest illustrators/ comic artists.


Groo Vs. Conan #1
32 Pages
$3.50

Status: Trade-waiting

Additional Notes: I’ve only recently come to realize how great Sergio Aragones is– and this combination of Conan and Groo should be hilarious.


The Manara Library Vol 6
296 Pages
$59.99

Status: Firm Order

Additional Notes:  Milo Manara is another legendary illustrator. Dark Horse is really pumping out quality stuff– pick this up or regret it.


LM PREVIEWS BALLOON DC COMICS
Infinity Man and the Forever People #1
$2.99
32 pages

Status: Hmmm

On one hand, this has the Kirby characters– so that’s a good thing… But on the other hand, Dan Didiot is in involved (which is bad).
LM PREVIEWS CERTIFIED SHIT BANNER FINAL
Justice League of America Vibe Vol 1 Breach TP
232 pages
$16.99

Status: Certified Shit

Additional Notes: This is where the concept of reprinting everything in trade is shown to be such a complete fucking dumb idea. This useless waste of paper will get tiny orders and will go out of print faster than Miley Cyrus can smoke a sliff.

Brightest Day Omnibus HC
969 Pages
$75.00

Status: POS

Additional Notes: The front cover of this book should be a picture of Geoff Johns jumping a shark.
LM PREVIEWS CERTIFIED SHIT BANNER FINAL

The Sandman Overture Limited Edition Patina Statue
$299.95

Status: POS of the Month

Additional Notes: They’ve managed to put out the sum total of two fucking issues of this travesty and they’re already soliciting $300 statues. It just goes to show DC management are a shower of cunts.

Grayson #1
32 Pages
$2.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: Former sidekick starts working for a secret service agency– just like the Winter Soldier. Are DC and Marvel incapable of not copying every fucking thing from each other?

Star Spangled Stories featuring G.I. Zombie #1
$2.99
32 pages

Status: What do you think?

Additional Notes: This may as well be called this “Corporate Mandated Trademark Protection Comic” #1. Normally I’ll pay attention to a Palmiotti/Gray comic– but let’s face in, this one is dead on arrival. Ba-dum-tish!

DC Comics Gotham City Garage Catwoman Statue
$349.99
Status: Hmmm

Additional Notes: Going by DC’s recent standards, this is actually a really nice looking statue. It does share one thing in common with DC Collectibles recent output though– the price is ridiculously (stupid) high.

Wonder Woman Art of War Statue
$79.99
Status: POS

Additional Notes: Just take a look at this piece of shit. The pose is far too dainty for the Goddess of War.
LM PREVIEWS BALLOON IDW
Ragnarok #1
32 Pages
$3.99

Status: Trade-Waiting

Additional Notes: Walt Simonson on writing and art. Just give me this as a nice sumptuous hardcover already.

 



Transfomers Vs. G.I. Joe #1
$3.99
32 pages

Status: Firm Order

Additional Notes: Normally I’d run screaming from a Transformers OR a G.I. Joe comic– let alone one featuring both together. But Tom Scioli of Godland fame is on writing and art– so that makes it an immediate must-have.



Starstruck Treasury Edition
72 Pages
$9.99

Status: Firm Order

Additional Notes: Michael Kaluta giant-size art? Yes, please!

LM PREVIEWS BALLOON IMAGE COMICS
That’s Because You’re A Robot (One-Shot)
32 Pages
$3.99

Status: Firm Order

Additional Notes: Anything with art by Shaky Kane gets an immediate order from me. If you’re not familiar with him, just imagine if Jack Kirby had taken a bucket of LSD. Be sure to keep a look out for Kane’s Cap’n Dinosaur one-shot as well.

Low #1
36 Pages
$3.50

Status: Trade-waiting

Additional Notes: Some of you might remember a short-lived company called Radical, who published a great mini-series called The Last Days of American Crime by Remender and Tocchini. Well, they’ve come together again for this series. Remender’s writing has been patchy of late but Tocchini’s art should be worth it.LM PREVIEWS BALLOON ABSTRACT STUDIOSZombie Tramp #1
24 Pages
$3.75

Status: Tempted

Additional Notes: How can you go wrong with a comic called Zombie Tramp, eh?
Damsels in Excess #1
32 pages
$3.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: Yet another pun-based comic from Aspen. This has to be the worst logo I have ever seen on a comic.LM PREVIEWS ASPEN COMICS LFT BANNER
Knights of the Skull TP
96 Pages
$12.99

Status: Uh……

Additional Notes: Something tells me that a trade called “Tales of the Waffen SS” is going to be a bit of a tough sell…

Rogue Trooper Tales of Nu Earth Vol 4 TP
288 Pages
$32.99

Status: Recommended

Additional Notes: The Final collection of the Rogue Trooper stories– hard-bitten sci-fi stories as only 2000AD can do them.
Elric The Ruby Throne HC
64 Pages
$12.99

Status: Firm Order

Additional Notes: Originally produced in France, this translated version looks awesome.



Doctor Who: The Eleventh Doctor #1
32 Pages
$3.99

Status: Intrigued

Additional Notes: Titan has hired some of the top 2000AD talent for this– making it worth keeping an eye on.


Amazing Spider-Man #1.1
32 Pages
$3.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: The blurb for this promises “A new and reverent spin on the first 60 days of Spider-Man.” Reverent?!? What, is this meant to make up for shitting on the character and the mythos for the last 6 or 7 years?
Knights of Sidonia Vol 9
184 Pages
$12.95

Status: Recommended

Additional Notes: This series gets better and better with every volume. Why are you not buying this for god’s sake?Grimm Fairy Tales Presents Swimsuit Special 2014
48 Pages
$4.99
 

Status: POS

Additional Notes: Do I REALLY need to explain why this is a piece of shit?LM PREVIEWS BOOKS & MAGAZINES BANNER FINALWalt Disney Drawn from Imagination
144 Pages
$14.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: A biography of Walt Disney for young readers… So I’m guessing it whitewashes out all the times he was a Grade A shitbag– like when he denounced other filmmakers to the McCarthy Hollywood Witch-Hunts?

The Twilight Zone FAQ
500 Pages
$24.99

Status: Tempted

Additional Notes: I’ve gotten a couple of similarly formatted books from this publisher (Applause Books) and they were both thoroughly enjoyable… Plus, The Twilight Zone is a TV program that I’ve always appreciated.

Words for Pictures – The Art and Business of Writing Comics and Graphic Novels
224 Pages
$24.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: So, Brian Bendis is trying to put out an instructional manual on how to write comics, like actual comic books from fucking Bendis aren’t bad enough.
LM PREVIEWS APPAREL BANNER FINAL Doctor Who – Fourth Doctor Arm Warmers
$16.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: Fuck off back to the 80s with your arm-warmers.LM PREVIEWS TOYS STATUES MODELS BANNER FINAL

Game of Thrones – Collectable Dragon Egg Box Set
$99.99

Status: Intriguing…

Additional Notes: These actually look pretty decent– irrespective of the attachment to the genre.

Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy – Rockmaster Electric Guitar
$224.00

Status: POS

Additional Notes: Not nearly as good as my Vampirella BC Rich Mockingbird!

Iron Maiden – The Trooper 8 Inch Retro Action Figure
$29.99

Status: Firm Order

Additional Notes: “You’ll take my life but I’ll take yours too, You’ll fire your musket but I’ll run you through, So when you’re waiting for the next attack, You’d better stand there’s no turning back.”

LM PREVIEWS CERTIFIED SHIT BANNER FINALHelmet of Themistokles
$295.00

Status: Overpriced Piece of Shit

Additional Notes: Just know that if you buy this shit, you might be feeding Frank Miller’s rumored alcoholism. Although if that stops him from creating new comics, that may not be such a bad thing…

Master of the Universe Snake Mountain Statue
$299.00

Status: Makes me want to do the Skeletor voice…

Additional Notes: Perfect for use as a dining table centerpiece when great Aunt Hildegard comes over for dinner.

Space 1999 Moonbase Alpha Model Kit
$39.99

Status: Eagle to Pad 1

Additional Notes: I can’t stand model kits– but I’m tempted by this. Fuck it, I’m tempted by just the box art!
LM PREVIEWS IMPORT TOYS BANNER FINALLM PREVIEWS CERTIFIED COOL BANNER

DC Comics Starfire Bishoujo Statue
$69.99

Status: Certified Cool

Additional Notes: Memo to DC Collectibles… THIS is how you do a statue you fuckheads!

Star Wars BBQ Tongs
$39.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: What next? Stars Wars sweeping brushes, Star Wars dustpans, Star Wars buttplugs?! These fuckers will make any useless crap just to crowbar another few dollars out of you.


Freddy Vs. Jason – Freddy Krueger Bishoujo Statue
$69.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: When I watched Nightmare on Elm Street, I never, ever once mused “Freddy Krueger really needs big boobs.”
LM PREVIEWS COLLECTIBLES & NOVELTIES BANNER FINAL

Star Trek Tribble Coin Purse
$24.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: First of all… A Coin Purse? Second, this is a coin purse covered in ginger pubes. Buying this could only be interpreted as a sign of sexual deviancy.

Game of Thones Iron Throne Bookend
$22.99

Status: Tempted

Additional Notes: This looks pretty decent. I wouldn’t be ashamed to have this on one of my bookshelves.

Star Trek TNG Build A Bridge Bobblehead
$1p.99 each

Status: POS

Additional Notes: I can’t think of anything I hate more that fucking goddamn bobbleheads. And these are “deluxe” bobbleheads no less– which means they’re even more fucking stupid than normal bobbleheads.
LM PREVIEWS DIGITAL MEDIA BANNER FINALFist of the North Star Box Set
$149.95

Status: POS

Additional Notes: Some people love FotNS. I, on the other hand, fucking hate this ugly piece of shit. It’s one of the worst anime ever produced.

A Certain Scientific Railgun Season 2 Part 1
$59.98

Status: Tempted

Additional Notes: I really must get around to watching this. Railgun in one of my favorite manga at the moment.

Noseferatu The Vampire
$19.97

Status: POS

Additional Notes: Some film buffs will tell you this is one of the greatest films of all time. Well, they’re fucking idiots. This film is shit– like pretty much every silent film.LM PREVIEWS PREVIEWS UK BANNER FINALStar Wars X-Wing Knife Block
£79.99

Status: POS

Additional Notes: I was thinking that I was taking it easy on Star Wars merch this month– and then Diamond came along with this heap of garbage.


Star Wars Stormtrooper Mug
£17.99

Status: Tempted

Additional Notes: I don’t give a shit if y’all think I’m a hypocrite given my relentless slagging off of overpriced Star Wars stuff… But I’m really fucking tempted to get this.



Commando Over the Top GN
£16.99

Status: Recommended

Additional Notes: Commando is one of the UK’s longest running comics– with over 4,700 issues published to date. This is a collection of 10 World War 1 themed stories.

So we’re well into the summer at this stage. I hope the weather is good where you are… At least we had the World Cup for a month. In the comics world, Marvel and DC are putting out the same old shit, just wrapped in different packages. Is it just me, or is IDW improving in the quality lately? Dark Horse is as good as ever! (Don’t ever change, DH!) I never cease to be amazed how bad some of the genre merchandise can be, but there’s always a gem or two hidden amongst the shit.

This entry was posted in Comic Books, Commentary, Hardcovers & Graphic Novels, Inveterate Media Junkies™ Exclusive, Locusmortis, New Comic Book Shop Products, Opinion, Previews Hits & Misses™ and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Locusmortis’ PREVIEWS Hits and Misses™

  1. phil says:

    So Bendis wants 2 usher in a new generation of writers that tell a 24 page story, but lasts six, 2 eight issues. Next move, yours Geoff Johns.

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